I don't know what to write. I just opened up Blogger. I'm at Aidan's place, I've been awake for several hours while Aidan slept, but he's awake now. He worked this morning from midnight till eight, then got home just past nine and went to bed.

We're going to Chantell's place in Hastings tonight for New Year, but again Aidan has to work from midnight till eight so he won't be there for the actual New Year. That means I'll miss out on a New Years kiss! Again.

Oh my god. They all think their mail is so important.

There are hurricanes and tsunamis and famines and wars going on worldwide, and these people are whinging about a missing parcel.

Billions of years of evolution and we end up with these idiots. What was the point?

Working for Australia Post is an exercise in Doublethink.

As far as customers know, redirections apply to parcels as well as letter mail.
I know that's not the case.

As far as customers know, all registered post articles are signed for.
I know it doesn't happen.

As far as customers know, they're talking to somebody who cares.
What a load of crap.

You'd think that after spending four nights straight with Aidan, I'd be somewhat sick of him. You'd think that I'd be wanting my own space, to do my own thing. You'd think I'd be glad to be rid of him.

Instead I'm sitting here pining more than ever. Missing him. It's as though I've grown accustomed to his presence, thus making his absence the more conspicuous. I listen to the Smashing Pumpkins, not only because I like to; also because I can almost hear Aidan singing along. In some small way it brings him closer.

Sigh. I have to go back to work tomorrow. I've almost forgotten how to do my job. It's going to be a busy two days. I have Friday off, and Monday of course. Then back to normality. I don't like normality.

Under instruction from Harold (or possibly Howard) I am to say that he believes I am talented. Or something.

Christmas. It is an irritating, expensive, overrated time of year. But I had a fairly good one this year! First, the long drive to my parents' place on Christmas Eve, giving Kim a lift up as well. Then the even longer drive to Aidan's parents' place on Christmas night. And stuff. It's been enjoyable, but I feel like I've moved into the car. Now I'm not in it, I feel lost and alone!

Gifts received:
The Eagles "Hell Freezes Over" DVD
"Good Morning Vietnam" DVD
"Moving Pictures" by Terry Pratchett
"The Turning" by Tim Winton
Chocolates x2
Teddy bear
Blue glass vase
Cash
Book voucher
Sanity voucher
Asian-style bowl & chopsticks
Funny little cat statue with dangly legs

Somewhat buggered. Long day at work, then Kenyon's fairwell bash - his last day on 29 December. Just got home, changed into my pj's, and put stuff in the wash... very small load, only a few days worth of washing, but I need clean stuff for the lovely long weekend ahead of me.

So tired.

Quoteable Quote of the Day
Dana Scully: Nothing happens in contradiction of nature; only in contradiction of what we know of it.

I had lunch at Hungry Jack's today, just to observe a curious phenomenon I have seen there before.

The toilets there have large red signs on the doors, readable from across the room, saying "Please ask our friendly staff for access to washrooms" - that is to say, the toilets are locked and only staff members have keys. I find it fascinating that people continually go up to those doors and push on them. Some of them even obviously read the sign before pushing on the door. What do they expect to happen? It has puzzled me for about four years. Do people think the signs don't apply to them? Surely these doors know I'm not going in there to shoot up, so they'll open for me!

The Waifs, Love Serenade

When the night-time comes you can hear
My heart calling
Calling out to you my one true love
Thinking about you all of the while
Thinking about you it's making me smile
Honey I'm sitting on top of the world just
Thinking about you

In the morning light that's when I'm feeling right
Another day come, another day go, another day closer till I make you my own
Honey I'm siting on top of the world
Just thinking about you

I wouldn't say it if it wasn't true
Honey I'm in love with you
I'm going to show you what I can do

Comeover here you've gotta be told,
My love for you is out of control
Honey I am sitting on top of the world,
Just thinking about you girl
I'm going to show you how much I care,
Marry you and take you away some where
Sit back in a rocking chair and rock all day with you my dear

Cause I love you, I love you I love you I love you

In the morning, in the evening, in the night time or in the middle of the afternoon

I love you I love you I love you I love you
Damn right

There is no greater truth. There is no divine being. There is no peace. There is no justice. There is no substance to a dream. There is no purpose for existance. There is no humanity.

There is biology. There is reproduction. There is death. There is destruction. There is a dream.

There is love.

Beach beach beach! I hadn't gone swimming in the sea for years until yesterday. Much fun was had, and I believe the saltwater may have even helped the eczema coming up again on my face.

And then it was a night of intensity. Some people need a darn sight more self confidence. Yeah, me as well, but I meant Aidan.

Now I'm at his place, he's at work, Matt is in the lounge room with crappy music playing.

Humans really are the most uniquely stupid species on earth. Who the hell else bothers with Where did we come from? or Why are we here? The dophins have got it right - swim around, jump through hoops, have sex for pleasure, and leave pointless speculation to other species. I blame the opposing thumb. Did dinosaurs have opposing thumbs? No! But they managed to rule the world for a considerable number of years. What do we need with this clumsy digit stuck to the sides of our hands? (Although it's useful for hitting the space bar.) Wow, humans are so great, we've produced things like the wheel, and New York, and wars. We bred Adolph Hitler and Joseph Stalin. We're the only creatures to kill each other for no particular reason. You don't find psychopath rats going around London killing prostitute rats and stealing their body parts. You don't find koalas slaughtering each other by the thousands for the sake of a religion which may or may not be true. You don't find goldfish deciding they'd like another bowl so they'll murder the inhabitants and move in.

I guess you don't find giraffes typing long monologues about it all on weblogs, either...

There's something about childhood. The way it never really leaves you, and things remind you of it unexpectedly. Sounds, sights, or even just nothing in particular. I've always had a thing about being able to hear somebody talking in the next room... that muffled sound, so you know somebody's there but you don't actually know what they're saying. I find that so comforting, and I'm sure it harks back to childhood. Mum and dad are still out there talking, as usual, so everything's fine with the world. Right now, I can hear somebody sweeping something... it sounds just like mum sweeping the verandah back at Longwood East. It's a kind of familiarity, even though there's really no link or similarity outside my own mind.

Sometimes I wish I was a child again. How I long for the days when no problem was too great for mum to deal with, armed appropriately with a band-aid, broom, or mop. When you're a kid you assume that adults have it all together, there's nothing they can't handle. Then you grow up and you've still got problems only they're bigger and you've got to deal with them yourself.

Well, the unthinkable has happened. Sexy Losers has been surpassed. My new favourite comic is Calvin & Hobbes. Smartest six year old I ever read!

Phew. Today. I'm tired! Dom got his results from uni today, he did very well and was all exciteable. There I was, minding my own business (for once) and he came running up to me, gave me a massive hug and started yelling about results. I have no idea what he actually got, but it must have been good.

Now I'm home just waiting for Aidan to get here. If I interpret his blog correctly, he may not have had a very good day today...

There is a giraffe in my bedroom. It's two meters tall, made of wood, and it's mum's christmas present. Getting it home was fun - walking along Glenferrie Road, me with the neck and head and Aidan with the bum and legs.

Aidan has been useful tonight. I am documenting this, as it may never happen again. He found the giraffe, he rubbed my back, he reminded me to put the towels in the dryer, and he's currently washing the dishes.

I will never be able to make Aidan entirely happy. No matter what I do or how much I love him, I never will. And it kills me. Read.

Today held an interesting but not entirely unexpected development. Allan has left the role of Assistant Resolutions Manager, and gone back to International Investigator. I don't blame him, really, he's been at the end of his tether for a while. So Joel has temporarily taken over his position. By that I am relieved, I had an awful feeling it was going to be Bec. So whilst I'll miss Allan, at least I have someone cool to work with still, and not a prude.

Which Office Moron Are You?
Rum and Monkey: jamming your photocopier one tray at a time.

What a nice weekend. Cossack's Christmas Party was on Saturday. The only mistake, I think, was starting it so early - started at 2pm. The idea was food, and THEN alcohol, but it didn't exactly work out that way. It all kind of happened at once. Anyway, it was Aidan's first time meeting most of that group of people, he seemed to fit in quite well. They're all freaks and outcasts in one way or another, just like us! Poor Kat didn't have such a good time though. It was brave of her to come, seeing as how she's not over the break-up and stuff. She spent some time at the end of the evening down here with just Aidan and I playing Trivial Pursuit, I think she enjoyed that.

Today was a lazy day. Lying around watching X-Files DVDs, snuggling, and so forth. Just Aidan and I, of course, I don't go around snuggling just anybody. It was really nice and restful, a good way to recover from the party.

Thank god it's the end of the week. Today was just bloody awful. All sorts of psychopaths and fuckwits (including a couple I thought I'd finished with) popped up. Allan called Frank with his incorrect deliveries today, that was an inspiring conversation to listen to. Allan got more and more irate and impatient as the call went on, the guy obviously wasn't listening or didn't want to hear. This is an idiot of a customer that was mine, but I referred it to Allan. I also had extensive contact with David today, him with his redirection problem. We'd made an error in our systems, we were redirecting from the wrong PO Box number. But I didn't know that, no, because the inbound operator didn't check when he first called in which they are supposed to do for all redirection enquiries. So I was telling him the redirection was working perfectly, we had no errors, and he was telling me that his PO Box still had twenty items of non-redirected mail in it and he hadn't received any at his new address. Eventually we figured it out, between him and me and Norm at the post office... but it was not a fun process! We had our monthly one-hour team meeting today too, which meant that we all had an hour less to get the same amount of work done. All in all, it was busy, hectic, frustrating, and highly unenjoyable. At one point Aidan sent me an email, which I didn't actually have time to read, and I replied with something awful in capital letters essentially telling him to leave me alone. Poor bloke! He thought I was mad at him.

Anyway, it's all over for another week. Christmas party tomorrow, should be fun. I invited Dom and Emma. Aidan and I are going goth, should be fun.

It's been a few days since I blogged and now I have to remember what happened when.

Monday night there was a fantastic storm all over Melbourne. Thunder, lightning, pouring rain, it was great. So Aidan and I took off shoes and socks and went outside. We ran through the rain and we kissed under the lightning. It was a sensational evening, and our clothes got washed for free!

Tuesday after work we went to see Bad Santa with Dom, Emma, and Jillian. It was ok I guess. Bits were funny, bits weren't, bits were predictable. Afterwards Aidan and I wandered around the city for a while... actually I can't remember what we did, but I'm fairly sure it was fun!

Wednesday we just stayed home.

Tonight Aidan's working, so I caught up with Andrew in the city. Dinner at the Pancake Parlour, wandered around for a bit, I bought some goth-ish gear to wear to the Christmas party this saturday. And now here I am.

Work this week has been dreadful. Everybody's been tired and irritable, I've had some really really annoying customers, and I've been tired. So while life in general is fantastic, work sucks. More than usual.

I wish more people would be happy to maintain purely text-based friendships - online, and SMS. Frankly I hate talking on the phone, and my need for personal contact has always been minimal. Except with partners, where I tend to go the other way and be clingy.

I'd forgotten how patronising and superior my dad can be. He really does believe he's better than most people, smarter than them. I suppose he is more intelligent than the average Euroa person, maybe even than most people, I don't know. But he's so arrogant about it and so easily critisises other people. I am loathe to say a bad word about most people... but sometimes I start to think like my dad, and I hate myself for it.

Well, I just got back from mum and dad's place. It's been an interesting afternoon. There were a lot of people I hadn't seen in a lot of years. It was odd to be amongst them as an adult instead of the chid I once was. Kim's most prominent memory of me was a picture of me when I was eight years old, up a tree with a koala. Steve didn't even recognise me at first, nor did Geoff. I had a good time, and got a lift back fairly early with Daryl and Miranda.

nor·mal P Pronunciation Key (nôrml)
adj.
Conforming with, adhering to, or constituting a norm, standard, pattern, level, or type; typical: normal room temperature; one's normal weight; normal diplomatic relations.

u·su·al P Pronunciation Key (yzh-l)
adj.
Commonly encountered, experienced, or observed: the usual summer heat.
Regularly or customarily used: ended the speech with the usual expressions of thanks.
In conformity with regular practice or procedure: Come at the usual time.

Well, as I thought, I got the email from Laura Bailey too late. The interview was meant to be on Thursday and I didn't get the email until Friday morning. I am somewhat disappointed. Laura, take a hint and organise things more than an hour in advance! Ah well, not to worry. Fame and glory await me elsewhere!

Home alone again tonight - how odd, that sounds like a third rate movie... oh yeah. Aidan's gone to a Tea Party concert tonight, although he'll be around later to wake me up and crash here before heading off for his military weekend. But that's ok, because I'll be at mum and dad's for the weekend. After living in that house for two years, they decide to have a housewarming party on Sunday.

I'm sure my legs hate me. They have dreadful eczema all over them, and any effort at hair removal just aggravates it. So I end up with ugly hairy legs as well as them being all red and inflamed and itchy. I will never understand how Aidan can tolerate even seeing them, let alone touching them, without being disgusted. But he isn't! Anyway, I waxed them last night... so they're going to be very itchy and annoying today. Sigh.

Anyway, about that email below. I think she actually sent it to me yesterday, but I didn't receive it until just now - so I think I've missed it. I would have done it, too! Oh well.

I must remember to call my parents today and let them know what train I'll be on tomorrow. Yes, I'm going to their place for the weekend, for their housewarming party - although they've lived there for two years now.

Anywho, must dash, some of us have got work to do!

Received an interesting email this morning...

Hi Stacey,

I produce the Drive program at the ABC in Sydney and we're doing a story on
bloggers today - we'd love to talk to you if possible! Your blog is great and if
you're able to spend 10 minutes on the phone with us at about 3.15 this
afternoon that would be great!

Please call me or email to let me know.

Look forward to hearing from you!
Laura

Laura Bailey
Producer
Richard Glover's Drive
702 ABC Sydney
P: 02 8333 1217
www.abc.net.au/sydney/richardglover/